How to Win Friends & Influence Social Media, Part 3

We’re in the middle of a short series on Dale Carnegie’s How to Win Friends and Influence People.  If you don’t have the book, the link has a way to buy it and/or download it straight to your Kindle.  If you need another version, Google is your friend.

How to Win Friends & Influence Social Media, Intro

How to Win Friends, Part 2

How to Win Friends, Part 3

Part 3 of How to Win Friends & Influence Social Media is “Ways to Make People Like You.”  I’m going to continue our numbering of chapters from the previous post.

4) Become Genuinely Interested in Other People

We covered some of this in the intro because it’s so important.   If you can become genuinely interested in someone else, you will make (social media) friends with them.

You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.

It really is simple: marketing is all about them, not you.  Period.  People want to be listened to, cared about, feel important … these are the basic emotions that drive social media and yes, friendship.  Many of my photographer friends will say “I became such great friends with my clients!”  Why not reverse the equation?  Why not make a lot more friends and *always* have clients?  Build your network.   As Robert Kiyosaki says in Rich Dad “Your network is your net worth.”   Why do we have to be beaten over the head with the same info time & time again until it sinks in?

5) Smile More

Yes, Carnegie suggests you smile.  Not a fake grin or a smirk.  Just the real deal – smile when you answer the phone, smile the first time you meet someone, smile when you shake hands at your business meeting.

“I have known people,” he said, “who succeeded because they had a rip-roaring good time conducting their business. Later, I saw those people change as the fun became work. The business had grown dull, They lost all joy in it, and they failed.”

This happens for a fact.  With the economy the way it’s been since 2006 or 2007, many photographers are struggling and with struggle comes dull, boring work they’ve taken because they “had” to take that work.  They work harder for less and plenty of talented photographers have hung up their camera-shingle because it simply isn’t worth it.  The joy has been sucked out, they stopped smiling and business ends and/or they fail.  (It’s ok to say a business “failed” – it doesn’t mean the person is a failure.)

6) Remember: A Person’s Name to that Person Is the Sweetest and Most Important Sound in Any Language

By this point in the discussion you’re thinking “ok, people are all self-centered, ego maniacs who want my attention, my smile, my interest, and my appreciation.  Yes.  They are.

Your success will b e determined by how much you can make what we would call “small sacrifices.”    ”Good manners,” said Emerson, “are made up of petty sacrifices.”  Your petty “sacrifice” in taking the time to learn someone’s name and remember it is partial payment for the reward of friendship and love, business success and social media prowess.

Someone’s name is their own.  When you say “Hey Jason!” into a crowded room, ALL the Jason’s in the room look, whether 1 or 4 are present.  They own that name.  They respond to it.  Use that knowledge to advance conversations, start friendships and solidify your connections.

So remember today’s 3 principles: 

• Principle 4 Become genuinely interested in other people.
• Principle 5 Smile.
• Principle 6 Remember that a person’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language.

And we’re again further on our way to winning true friends on the social media network of our choice.

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